-  smell smoke?  that is my ass dragging.

-  traffic gripe of the day:  seriously people, if you come to busy intersection that is ruled by stop signs only, has multiple options as far as turning, AND is without lane lines to guide you to turn, PLEASE travel in a fashion that gravitates toward the direction you intend to travel beyond the intersection.  so if you are planning on turning left at said intersection, kindly ease your way toward the left side of the lane.  people travelling straight should take a similar path.  and for fuck’s sake, if you are not turning right, you should NOT be within a car’s width of that right curb.  this allows those turning right to avoid sitting in a line behind you sackless tool belts tht do no understand the rhythm with which an intersection is to progress.  next time, the grill of the sexterra might not look so distant in the rearview mirror of you oversized rollerskate, i mean, miata.

-  thanks go out to alexis and irma for hosting a kick ass italian wines class last night.  yall missed out.  BUT you can hit them up tomorrow night for high powered beer night!  they are going to offer tasting of high alcohol content beers from 6:30 - 8:30 for $15.  AND you get to keep a chimay glass!  tell ‘em theYerg sent ya. 

-  dear hollywood, please stop making movies with subtitles.  i would have stayed home and read the book of the movie you just ruined.  the point of a movie is to be able to see the people act it out.  if you have subtitles, you might as well hire schmoes off the street as actors because i don’t want to have to rely on my peripheral vision to try and match the action with the dialogue.  plus it hurts my eyes.

-  i am pretty sure i live my life by a code, i just don’t know how to decipher it.

-  you know what is sneaky?  the way chewing gum gives you the illusion of hydration.  just because your palette is wet, doesn’t mean you are hydrated.  i mean if you think about it, aren’t you just using more of your internal water to help compose the saliva to keep the gum fresh?  so that being the case, doesn’t chewing gum actually dehydrate you?  and yet your mouth is left moist.  very misleading.